


The Time Where Kanaya and Rose Were Right

by maidofvoid



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Cute Fluff Shit, F/F, F/M, NSFW, Post-Retcon, also theres sex, dave is black man, karkats pov, selfharm is in this too, so is Rose
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-30
Updated: 2015-12-06
Packaged: 2018-05-04 02:07:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5316200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maidofvoid/pseuds/maidofvoid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Flush crushes may break poor Karkat, but he can try and get through it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Flush Crush

  My name is Karkat Vantas, and I have had flushed feelings for Dave Strider for 3 months now. I feel so petty for admitting it, but I can’t deny the truth anymore. He’s everything I want in a matesprit. He always seemed like such a douche, but ever since that night- that one night; everything changed. I didn’t mean to let him in, and I don’t think he meant to get so involved with me. It was just a sick twist of fate, but there’s not much I can do about it now.

  All I can do is act like I still hate him, and hope he doesn’t see through me. It is getting harder to be Dave’s bro nowadays. Even the smallest touch from him makes me blush like a wiggler, which is impossible to hide from him. I keep getting lost while talking to him, and I can’t focus on anything. I still can’t believe it’s him I ended up being flushed for. Out of all the miserable assholes on this meteor, it just had to be Strider.

  “Ay Karkles.” Speak of the human devil, of course Dave had to interrupt my private time. I look up and see his stupid face, which is -as usual- covered by a pair of glasses. I used to think that they were the stupidest fucking things, but now I know why he wears them. I know what he’s hiding, and I don’t blame him. I know how it feels firsthand.

  “What the fuck do you want, Strider?” I snap back at him. I hate being so rude to him, but if I stop he’ll know something is wrong. I can’t let him find out about me being flushed for him. He is, as John Egbert would say, “not homo”. That basically means he’s off limits to me, for some reason.

  “No need to be so rude.” Dave sits down next to me, mumbling something I can’t hear. It’s so cute when he does that an- what am I doing? I need to quit acting like this and get myself together. How else will I make it through the next year and a half? I don’t get to finish my thought, as I’m interrupted by Dave leaning his stupid head on my shoulder. The touch of his soft hair against my cheek makes me shiver, but I feel warm. I know I should push him away, but I want him to stay like this.

  “What are you doing?” I rudely ask him. He groans as a response and stretches out his back. I’m guessing he’s pretty tired, since Rose and Kanaya basically drag the poor guy everywhere. I decide to just let him stay, and lean into him a bit. He eventually falls asleep like that, and I decide to take advantage of this moment. I quietly turn my face and press my lips to the top of his head. A smile creeps onto my face, but quickly fades when he quickly shoots his head up and looks around. He jumps off the couch and I can see that he's shaking. I stand up and walk in front of him to get a better view of his face. He tries to turn away, so I cup his face in my hands. Sure it's not the friendliest gesture, but I'm not having him avoid me like this.

  "Karkat, please stop." Dave sighs. He pulls my arms away from him then walks away. I let him see my weak side, why can't I see his? I know it's hard to let people in, but he's been doing this for a whole year. I just want to be there for him, but he won't let me. I plop back down onto the couch and place my head in my hands.

  “Karkat… are you okay?” I look up and see Kanaya looming over me, looking concerned as usual. I shake my head and return to my sulking, and she quietly sits down besides me. I feel her hand on my shoulder, and I turn my head to face her.

  “I don’t know how to tell him.” I feel tears rising in my eyes, but I hold them back. Kanaya strokes my arm, and I can’t hold back the tears anymore. I rest my head in her arms and let out a small sob. She pulls me closer and comforts me.

  “It’s alright, Karkat. You’re alright.” She assures me. I cry until I can’t anymore, but Kanaya stays with me the whole time. She’s acting like a proper moirail, better than Gamzee ever was. Too bad she’s already busy with Rose, I’d love to have her as a moirail. I eventually clear away the red tears falling down my face and pull away from Kanaya. She smiles at me, but eventually leaves me to go help Rose. I decide that instead of sitting around being sad, I decide to get up and do something productive. I know that Terezi and Vriska wouldn’t need any help, so I go straight back to Kanaya to see what they’re up to.

  “Oh, Karkat, we were just talking about you!” Rose exclaims when I enter the room. I quirk an eyebrow at her, but I quickly realize what they were talking about. Kanaya was the first person I told about my flushcrush for Dave, and I expected her to tell Rose. Kanaya walks over to Rose and whispers something in her ear, which Rose seems to agree with.

  “Karkat, Rose and were talking about how you should tell Dave.” Kanaya explains, glaring at her matesprit every few words. Rose looks smugly proud of herself, and I began to worry. Did she already tell Dave? I really hope not. Anyway, there’s no way I could tell him. I value his friendship too much, even if friendship is a fucking disease. Also, I’ve managed to mess up in almost every quadrant. How am I supposed to deal with a human matespritship? I wouldn’t want to hurt Dave.

  “Hell no.” I respond, to which Kanaya sighs and Rose chuckles. I simply can’t do it, but I would like to. Imagine how much easier life would be if I got rid of all this new baggage. Imagine if he felt the same way. I stay around a bit longer to help Kanaya measure some fabric for a new dress she's making. Rose ignores us, clearly more interested in one of my romantic novels. I tell her a bit about it, and she uses the Alternian translator book she alchemized to read it. I keep sneaking glances at her to see if she enjoys it in hopes that I'll finally have somebody to discuss romance books with.

  She seems to be enjoying it, but she eventually gets distracted by Dave calling her over. My wriggler-like curiosity kicks in, and I follow her around the corner to listen in on them. I know it's rude, but I need to know what they're talking about.

  "Dave, just tell him." Rose hisses. My ears perk up, and I move a bit closer to listen in better. I can hear Dave hesitating to say something, which is strange compared to his usual demeanor.

  "Karkat can never find out." What can't I find out? What is Dave hiding from me? I decide to quit being an idiot and go back to help Kanaya. I can't get what he said out of my head, though. Kanaya looks annoyed when I come back, and I think she knows what I did. I quietly pull out my husktop to check Trollian, seeing if he’s online or not. As always, his icon is dimmed. I don’t know why I even expected him to be on. After the whole retcon thing went down, he’s been more into “Face-to-face” communication. I remember him saying something about how much he regretted not actually talking to someone, but his words got lost in a mumble.

  “Karkat, you can’t do this through Trollian. You need to tell him in person.” Kanaya sighs, shutting the screen of my husktop. I snap back to look at her and I can see the seriousness in her eyes. I know she's right. God, why is she always so right?

  “But how am I supposed to tell him? I’m pretty sure he won’t even fucking talk to me after what happened.” I mumble, my thoughts scrambled in my head. Most of them are about Dave, but the rest are just confusing. Kanaya yells for Rose, and she rushes back into the room. Rose greets Kanaya with a small peck on lips, then stands up on a pedestal. Kanaya wraps a tape measure around her waist, and the two engage in a conversation. Suddenly, Vriska and Terezi bound into the room. Kanaya ignores the two, continuing to measure her matesprit. Vriska picks something up off the table, looking at it for a moment.

  “Is this the movie?” Terezi questions, basically hopping in the air. Kanaya merely nods, and the “Scourge Sisters” take off. I wonder what movie it is, I’ll have to ask Kanaya later. Maybe Dave would like to watch it with me? Rose steps off the pedestal and sits herself beside me, opening her own laptop. As soon as she turns it on, an updating notification pops up.

  “Fuck.” She mutters to herself, and I can’t help but laugh. I’m not sure if I’ve ever heard a single profane word come from her mouth before. It’s quite surprising.

  The evening with Kanaya and Rose draw to a close when the two decide they need some privacy. I take the long stroll to my room, walking past Vriska and Terezi in the living room. I make sure to say goodnight to them, as I do every night. I walk past Dave’s door, wondering what I should do. I want to say goodnight to him, but he may not want to see me. Walking up to it, I tap on the door. For a few minutes, nobody comes to the door. As I prepare to leave, the door cracks open. Dave peeks out, his hair hanging in his face.

  “What do you want?” His freckled face is stern, and I’m sure he’s glaring me. I can only stare at my feet, guilt’s catching up to me. I try back away, but Dave opens the door. He steps into the frame. He's wearing his old record shirt, and he has an apparent lack of pants.

  “Listen, I’m sorry. It’s just been an off day for me.” He apologizes, avoiding eye contact. I only nod, walking away. I don’t want to get caught up in this right now. I don’t want to fall even harder for him. I open the door to my room, feeling a hint of anger in my chest. I slam down on my bed, a shitty reminder that we’re out of sopor. Apparently we have to use grist for “better purposes”, and assuring we don’t have nightmares isn’t good enough.

  I close my eyes, hoping that I could maybe sleep. Instead of darkness, I only see his face. Fuck, not now. Not after what just happened. I feel something rise in my jeans, and I know it’s too late for me. I move my hand down, slowly at first. I tug at the zipper, pulling it down then unbuttoning my pants. The bulge sticking out of my underwear confirms my fears. I slowly pull both down, exposing my red tentabulge. I place my hand around the tip, quickly moving up and down. Several small, quick moans escape between my lips. The fast movements of my hands on my bulge make it stiffen even more, and my breath hitches. A few more slow strokes, and I reach a full climax. Genetic material covers my thighs, and my bulge falls in my hand.

  I clean up my mess, and change into sweatpants. Falling into bed, I look around at the room around me. All I can imagine is Dave. Dave’s face, his dark skin, his messy blonde hair, his freckles, his red eyes, his everything. I roll over, groaning and rolling my eyes. I’m such a fucking pathetic asshole. 


	2. Harm Comes Your Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW: graphic depictions of violence, selfharm, and abuse mentions.

 

  “You’re the judge, oh no! Set me free.” Great, Dave’s playing his loud ass music again. I storm out the door, heading down the hall. Dave’s door is shut, and lights pour out from the bottom. He’s probably using candles.

  “Dave? I know you’re in there fucker.” I exclaim while pounding on his door. No answer. I knock a little harder, still nothing. Fine, looks like I’ll have to let myself in. I turn the knob and slowly open the door.

  “If you’re naked say something no- Holy shit.” My eyes turn straight to Dave, straight to the red pouring out of his leg. There’s a silver, sharp razor right beside him. It’s covered in the red, too. Dave only looks up at me, tears spilling out of his red eyes. I can’t say anything, I can’t move. Rose warned me about this, that humans have emotions they can’t control. Is this what I wasn’t supposed to know?

  “Go away.” Dave croaks, his voice only slightly louder than a whisper. I want to stop him, I want to grab him and tell him it’ll all be okay. Sadly, that’s a lie. It won’t be okay for him, nothing I can say will change that. So, I walk out of the room. There’s truly nothing else I can do. I walk back down to my room in a dizzy haze. I can’t stop seeing the red blood, the tears, the razor. I don’t even see where I’m going, and I keep walking when I bump into someone.

  “D-did he do it?” The person I bumped into asks. I whip around, seeing messy blonde hair. It’s Rose… she knows what’s happening.

  “Yeah.” My voice is quiet, less scratchy. I hope she’s able to hear how much I care. I hope she knows that I’ll do anything to help. Rose merely nods and runs down to Dave’s room. She beats on his door, and I can’t move. This is what I wasn’t supposed to know, this is what Rose yelled at him for.

  “Dave! Please let me in, I can’t let you do this anymore,” She screams, tears slipping out of her eyes. She drops to the floor, breaking into sobs.

  “Please.” I rush to her side, helping her off the ground. It’s the least I could do.

  “I’ve got this.” I assure her. I turn the knob slowly, opening the door. Rose stands beside me, sniffling between tears. She’s shaking pretty badly, I’m not sure if she’s fit to go in. I’m not even sure if I’m fit to go in.

  I look into the room, and Dave looks at us. His leg is clean and bandaged, and the razor’s gone. He’s crying, too, mumbling to himself. Rose runs past me, throwing herself into his arms. He only sits there, muttering apologies. I try to sneak out of the room, I don’t know what else to do.

  “Don’t leave, Karkat.” Rose looks up from the hug, then releases Dave. I shoot her a confused look, and she nods at me.

  “We need someone to stay with him for the night, just to make sure he’s going to be okay. I’m going back to bed so I can talk to him tomorrow.” Rose strokes my arm, and I know why I must stay now. She leaves the room, and we’re left alone.

  “I’ll grab some blankets from my room and sleep on the floor tonight.” I tell Dave, and start to leave the room. He grabs my arm, setting me next to him on his bed. I feel my heart pounding, but I know now’s not the time. He takes his black glasses off, setting them on the bedside table. He wraps his arms around me, holding me close. I freeze up at first, not used to the touch. I can’t freeze up now, he’s my friend. He needs my help right now. I hug him back, and I feel him grip onto my shirt. He’s shaking, holding back sobs.

  “Let it out, man. I won’t judge you.” I assure him, running my hand through his blonde hair. He lets tears fall from his face, mumbling to himself. I push him back, taking his shoulders in my hands. He looks down at his legs, still shaking.

  “I-I had another nightmare about him, about m-m-my brother. I c-can’t deal w-with it anymore, Kark-kat.” He stumbles on his words, and he can’t even look up at me. I take him back into my arms, assuring him that’ll all be okay. That he’d be okay. The only responses I get are nods and mumbling, but that’s all I need. Just knowing he’s able to breathe, that he still has the want to live, gives me hope for him.

  “Can we just go to sleep? I want this night to be over.” Dave mutters into my shoulder. I let him go, and leave the room to let him get changed. He only takes a few moments before opening the door. I turn to look at him, and he looks like absolute shit. This poor guy has been through far too much. I tell Dave that I’m going to grab some stuff so I can sleep on his floor, but he grabs my hand before I can go.

  “Can you sleep in my bed?” Dave asks, staring at his feet. I don’t want to deny his request, so I let him pull me back into his room. I crawl into his bed as he does, pulling the covers over both of us. I face him, letting my eyes adjust to the dark. When I’m able to focus on what’s in front of me, I see Dave’s face. Was he looking at me, too? Without warning, he quickly turns the other way and backs up into me. His back is against my stomach, so I reach my arm over his waist. I can feel him breathing against me. We fall asleep like that, with him in my arms.

  When the lights come back on, Dave and I only lay against each other. It was a tough night for both of us, we didn’t want to move an inch. I think Rose recognizes that, as she doesn’t even come in to wake us up.

  “Should we get up?” Dave asks, his voice still strained. He can’t avoid the inevitable, Rose will need to talk to him about this. She’s probably already cleaned out the meteor of all sharp objects, knowing her. I don’t blame her, I’d do the same for Dave. I’d do anything for him.

  “Yeah, I guess so.” I mumble, still laying down. I muster the strength to sit up, and Dave just groans. He knows he has to get up too, and I highly doubt he really wants to. I push the covers down, and shove him off his bed. He hits the ground, and I get up after him. Luckily, his bed is close to the ground and he didn’t get hurt.

  “You can thank me later.” I joke as I stumble out of the bed. I walk past him, and he grabs my ankle. I trip over his arm, falling straight onto the ground. I hit my horn on the hard floor, sending immense pain through my head. I would usually be screaming at Dave right now, but when I look over at him… I feel like the world stopped. He’s genuinely smiling, a laugh escaping through his mouth. I join in on the laughter with him, just happy knowing that he’s getting a moment of peace. It’s enough to make me ignore the stinging pain in my horn. We stay like that, laughing and smiling at each other. Our moment ends with someone clearing their throat in the doorway. Rose stands above us, a smile across her face.

  “Glad to see you boys are having fun, but Kanaya and I have to steal Dave for an hour or two.” She motions him towards the door, and he gets up off the ground. He extends a hand down to me, helping me up. I brush the dirt of my pants, and briskly walk past Rose. Before I leave the room, I turn and face Dave.

  “Meet me in my hive afterwards? I’d like to talk through this all, too. I know I may not be the best friend, but I can still help.” I ask him. He takes a moment to process what I said, I can see him bite his lip. He only does that when he’s deciding something. Please be a good decision.

  “I should probably talk to you about it. I’ll come.” Dave agrees before kicking Rose and I out of his room to change. We stand outside his door, making sure he exits safely. Rose takes him down the hall, and I go into the kitchen. I open the fridge, looking to see if we needed to alchemize more troll-oriented food. There’s a little bit left, I should still probably mark that down on the Alchemy request list later. Not starving is pretty important.

  “Heard your little human boy got a lil’... cut up last night.” A scratchy voice exclaims behind me. I almost reach for the knife which sits cleanly besides me. It’d be so easy to kill this shithead. Just one stab, and he's gone.

  “Fuck off, Makara.” I growl, refusing to look at him. I can’t believe I was ever moirails with the asshole.

  “I honestly wish I could, Karbro. This place is the worst, all I can do is watch you touch yourself and Dave cry.” I can feel his grin without even looking at him. I clutch my fingers around the knife, trying to tell myself not to react.

  “Maybe you shouldn’t watch Dave at all, you dick.” I grumble. He steps closer to me, breathing on my neck. I feel the hairs standing up, I’m nearly frozen with fear.

  “But I like watching him in pain.” He whispers into my ear. I’m giving only a moment to react, whipping around with a knife in my hand. The silver of the knife tears through the grey of his skin. The cut is deep, and purple blood instantly spills out of it. I drop the knife, surprised by what I just did. I take a step back, staring at Gamzee. His eyes brighten, his smile widens, his current looks could kill. He could kill.


End file.
